Looking in from the outside, you can see the toll conflict takes on an organization. Productive work and progress doesn’t get accomplished. Instead, the activities go something like this:
- Person A gets angry with Person B
- B reciprocates
- A & B go to their respective corners and construct different (competing) narratives about why this conflict began and why it should continue
- A & B recruit allies in their fight, seeking out people who will take up their cause
- The conflict escalates
If you are a project manager, you have almost certainly gone through this cycle at some point, but it’s a good reminder that the better way is to sit down and resolve it face to face. If you can play that role within your organization, it’s a great thing. Pull the parties together before they begin to recruit allies. Bring everyone in one location and try to work through, helping each side understand the other and reach a tenable solution. It’s the role of a mediator, and it’s one that takes a careful touch and some maturity and experience, but it also shows leadership.
Keep in mind that managers who make a practice of resolving conflicts go a lot further in their careers than managers who win conflicts.